Monthly Archives: April 2014

Spring Done Sprung

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Sring done sprung and love is in the air, or perhaps pheromones. Probably pheromones, but, let's pretend for one moment I'm not a cynic. So, love is in the air, and I drew a Cups spread for all you lovebirds. Let's see what the fertility bunny has brought us today:

What lies beneath: in the foundations position I see the Ace of Swords. This could go either way, my beauties; either bliss or torture. You either have the most wonderful sugar daddy or momma ever, or you are being chained in the basement against your will. In that case, kudos for breaking free long enough to read this garbage. Surely, there are better uses of your time, but who am I to judge.

Who you are, here and now: in the querent position I see the Lovers card, reversed. Hmm, coincidence? Perhaps. One thing's certain, you have love on your mind. You have taken your quarterly shower, slapped on some patchouli, and you are ready to venture forth in search of a nest you can share with some other lovely chickadee.

What stands in your way: in the obstacles position, I see the Nine of Swords. I'm taking the band-aide approach here. The object of your affection is not only less than interested , but really, really, has other crap on his or her mind. Things like how best to design a tin foiled hat to maximize defense against alien intrusion while still looking cute. Trust me, if you end up with this one, they're a fixer-upper.

What you hope for: in the aspirations position we have the Four of Wands card. I see you searching for stability in an inherently unstable person or situation. You want a non-traditional union, a happy little Manson family minus the crazy murder, plus the polyamory. Give it a shot. It works sometimes, I guess.

What has already happened: in the past position we've got the Two of Cups. Now the picture becomes clearer. When I was a teenager, I watched the Brady Bunch with a fresh perspective. I started to wonder if there was some sort of “special” relationship between Mr. And Mrs. Brady, and that maid of theirs. It seemed like they were too close. But, like, completely natural about it. I'm thinking now, that you, dear reader, are looking for your own Alice to add to the mix of an already sweet gig. Again, can't hurt to try. Well, maybe it can hurt, but it might be fun anyway.

What comes next: in the future position, we have the Eight of Pentacles. Some people have all the luck. Looks like you just might get your cake and eat it, too. What ever crazy stew your cooking will be deelish. That love adventure you want to have will most likely happen just as you want it to. To that, I say; screw tradition.

And here's hoping you have a better time with that than I can even imagine. I'm imagining it right now….wait, screw you! My opinion about love is that it's stupid, and messy, and worth it, and a crock of shit, and totally worth it. Get what you want, need, and makes you happy. You are a brave soul, and I commend you. It is my earnest opinion, however, and I'm pretty sure the J. Geils band will back me up here, that love stinks.